Today is a celebration of just how far we have come as women. A year ago the #metoo campaign and we have finally got the ball rolling when it comes to issues of diversity, gender and sexual relationships. Infact Aleshia Dixon put it to Lorraine this morning that the uncertainty of now means that anything can be brought to the table and opened up from discussion. That is why I wanted to talk about how we haven’t come far enough and why I believe we still live in a society that is structurally biased.
We have come along way since the bra burning era but we haven’t come far enough. If anything we’ve arrived in a sticky space where ‘toxic femininity’ thrives (yes there is a toxic femininity too). Toxic feminity is defined by women today trying to be superwomen. They have a strong career, their make up is ‘on fleek’ and they have the perfect body, as well as an immaculate home and are a pristine parent with moves like Jo Frost. Our idols are women like Kim Kardashian West who seemingly has it all- but also has all the money to pay her way. Infact let’s use all of the Kardashians as an example of this unattainable womanhood that women today are dying for. This to me is toxic. They say you can’t have it all and you really can’t. You can have a great career and struggle to balance your home life, you could have quality time with your children but have to sacrifice your career and spend loads of time in the gym and have to sacrifice both. And have wonky make up, or a messy home. But you truly can’t have it all.
The NHS have now linked women’s declining mental health with this ‘superwoman’ ideal. Back in the ’50s women were expected to be domesticated. Today women are expected to be domesticated and have the perfect career and ontop of it be beautiful. Clearly feminism has not gone far enough. Rather than shaming women who focus on their career or mums that stay at home, we should focus on us women achieving a balance in our lives and above all celebrate being real.